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Fauci Now Recommends Encasing Entire Body In Bubble Wrap To Protect Against COVID19

Alton

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#1
Fauci recommends encasing entire body in bubble wrap to protect against Coronavirus




Babylon Bee
Thu, 30 Jul 2020 22:59 UTC






© Babylon Bee
Washington, D.C. — At a press conference Wednesday, Dr. Fauci suggested that Americans cover their entire bodies in bubble wrap to protect against coronavirus.

"Studies have shown that this is very effective at stopping the virus, germs, and the oxygen that carries these things," Fauci said. "You will no longer have to worry about death by coronavirus, though I'm just a medical doctor and can't speak to any other risk factors this may introduce."

Of course, Dr. Fauci says that he and other Washington elites are exempt from the recommendation.

"I mean, other people should do that, not me," he said, chuckling. "I can go to a baseball game and stuff without worrying about protecting against that kind of stuff, because I'm a doctor. The virus and I are on good terms."

Some doctors quickly held a press conference to point out the dangers of wearing the new full-body bubble wrap cocoons, but their video was banned from Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube for containing dangerous medical misinformation.

At publishing time, Fauci had also pointed out that the bubbles are really fun to pop and admitted that may have informed his recommendation.
 

TAEZZAR

LADY JUSTICE ISNT BLIND, SHES JUST AFRAID TO WATCH
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#2
Of course, Dr. Fauci says that he and other Washington elites are exempt from the recommendation.
He is a very mentally sick person.
 

GOLDBRIX

God,Donald Trump,most in GIM2 I Trust. OTHERS-meh
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#4
The New Normal
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arminius

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#6
He is a very mentally sick person.
And worse, he is a greedy fuck who likes to hang with big money, and obviously cares more about having lots of money and power than the reality and truth of human medical care...

Any system that allows maskerade deceitful psychopaths like fuckchi to rule over the population needs significant correction...
 
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the_shootist

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#7
And worse, he is a greedy fuck who obviously cares more about having lots of money and power, than the reality and truth of human medical care...

Any system that allows maskerade deceitful psychopaths like fuckchi to rule over the population needs significant correction...
He's a little Jewish rat hiding behind an Italian name
 

Uglytruth

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#9
Think Napolion complex.
 
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#11
And there are several idiots that would actually do it. I do wish someone would get a trash bag and cover his head with it and pull the string real tight. Same to that female Nazi doc.
 

newmisty

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#13
I was also just going to remind everyone that this is a satirical piece from the Babylon Bee...
I think it needs to be mentioned because these days there's no more line delineating what's too far-fetched to be real.