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JOKE OF THE DAY!?!

BarnacleBob

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BarnacleBob

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BarnacleBob

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BarnacleBob

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BarnacleBob

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BarnacleBob

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BarnacleBob

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BarnacleBob

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BarnacleBob

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BarnacleBob

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BarnacleBob

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BarnacleBob

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BarnacleBob

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edsl48

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Nasty Pelosi and her driver were cruising along an Iowa

country road one evening when an old dairy cow loomed

in front of the car. The driver tried to avoid it but couldn't.

The aged cow was struck and killed. Nasty told her driver

to go up to the farmhouse and explain to the owners what

had happened and pay them for the cow.

She stayed in the car making phone calls.

About an hour later the driver staggered back to the car with

his clothes in disarray. He was holding a half-empty bottle

of expensive wine in one hand, a huge Cuban cigar in the

other, and was smiling happily, smeared with lipstick.

"What happened to you," asked Nasty?

"Well," the driver replied, "the farmer gave me the cigar,

his wife gave me the wine, and their beautiful twin daughters

made passionate love to me."

"What did you tell them?" asked Nasty Nancy.

The driver replied, "I just stepped inside the door and said,

'I'm Nancy Pelosi's driver and I've just killed the old cow.'

The rest happened so fast I couldn't stop it."
 

the_shootist

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Goldhedge

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michael59

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THAT WOULD have been a GREAT joke had you spelled 'RED' correctly. Unless of course she does have "read hair".
SPELLCHECK would not have caught it as "READ" is a word. GRAMMARCHECK may have though.
Oh come on. I totally destroyed that joke as only I could do in a way that only I could do. In fact I would say "I assonated it." kind of how I sing muzak. Hell in my defense of being grammatically correct I usually have to print one completed court doc to catch my errors then go back and fix them and then reprint and fix again. in fact I had to google assassination but it doesn't mean I will change the way I first spelled it.
 

Bottom Feeder

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Michael, you're absolutely correct there, you did assonate it.

assonated
Past tense of assonate; to correspond in sound, especially a vowel sound, that corresponds to another.​
 

Goldhedge

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"When you control opinion, as corporate America controls opinion in the United States by owning the media, you can make the [many] believe almost anything you want, and you can guide them."
-- Gore Vidal
(1925-2012) novelist, essayist, playwright, and provocateur
Source: from The Golden Age
 

BarnacleBob

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Someone_else

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A coupon to get Snap-On tools for 1/10 the list price would finish a perfect joke.
 

Goldhedge

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BarnacleBob

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BarnacleBob

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