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JOKE OF THE DAY!?!

Son of Gloin

Certainty of death? What are we waiting for?
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Lt Dan

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Being dyslexic myself, I have to do what it takes to adapt.
I'm probably also on the autistic spectrum and most certainly OCD!
So being I'm now a "smart ass", is that a step up? whistle:
 

Bottom Feeder

Hypophthalmichthys molitrix
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Curly was pretty worried. His girl friend was pregnant and he was going to have to take a blood test to see if he was the father. He was scared shitless when he went in to take the test but when he came out he was all smiles.
"Can they prove you're the father?" asked his buddy Larry.
"Ain't no way," replied Curly, "the dumb-ass nurse took the blood sample from my finger!"
 

Goldhedge

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Son of Gloin

Certainty of death? What are we waiting for?
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Being dyslexic myself, I have to do what it takes to adapt.
I'm probably also on the autistic spectrum and most certainly OCD!
So being I'm now a "smart ass", is that a step up? whistle:
I meant the word smartass in the most affectionately friendly, joking manner. I appreciate you, LTD. I’m not dyslexic, myself, but I know I have ADD and OCD and probably lots of other letters of the alphabet.
 

Fatrat

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So true though...
 

michael59

heads up-butts down
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yeah... this man is not so sure of that.
come one skinny prudence.....do you actually know what your cat defecating rodent control mechanism from the gods beyond has actually butt-mailed U?

Yeah, I hate my house lion but that shit does kill....so, what was this thread about?
 

Goldhedge

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mtnman

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mtnman

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Jump starting a toyota...
 

mtnman

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"Repurposed" Light fixtures, I know what they are, anyone else?
 

newmisty

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Lol

 

Goldhedge

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newmisty

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I like to carry a couple of those clad fifty cent rounds, hand 'em to any young cashiers, especially at Wally World and watch their faces, priceless.
Had 'em ask if the coin is real, call their manager or supervisor over to ask if they can except them. PRICELESS!
I really enjoy $2 bills. People flip out over em if they don't have to ask the manager. I once had some employees fighting over them so I dished out a couple.
 

newmisty

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Goldhedge

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Unca Walt

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Shee-itt.

When I wuz in my 20's, 30's, 40's... "Check Engine Lights" hadn't even been invented!

Now that I thinks onnit, even fargin turn signals were new.

So I took an RPG round in the gut at Little Big Horn, and they hadda replace my intestines with rope. Second-hand rope.