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JOKE OF THE DAY!?!

BarnacleBob

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And they said the world had changed, I'd have to agree....

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specsaregood

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That is funny, I was just thinking of that yesterday as I waited in line to checkout at the grocery store, 3 different middle aged women were going from checkout line to checkout line looking at something and moving to the next. All 3 of them finally stopped at the endcap at the stand I was at and grabbed a pack of C-batteries and walked back to their carts in other lines.
 

Goldhedge

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Krag

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This one always cracks me up:

Mujibar was trying to get a job in India.
The Personnel Manager said, "Mujibar, you have passed all the tests except one. Unless you pass it you cannot qualify for this job."
Mujibar said, "I am ready."
The Manager said, "Make a sentence using the words Yellow, Pink and Green."
Mujibar thought for a few minutes and said, "Mister Manager, I am ready."
The Manager said, "Go ahead."
Mujibar said, "The telephone goes green, green, green, and I pink it up, and say, 'Yellow, this is Mujibar.'"
Mujibar now works as a technician at a call center for computer problems. No doubt you have spoken to him.
 

mtnman

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GOLDBRIX

God,Donald Trump,most in GIM2 I Trust. OTHERS-meh
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BILLY JOEL is a PROPHET:
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the_shootist

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THE ECONOMY IS SO BAD THAT....

  • My neighbor got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
  • CEO's are now playing miniature golf.
  • Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
  • I saw a Mormon with only one wife.
  • McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
  • Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.
  • Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children's names.
  • A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.
  • A picture is now only worth 200 words.
  • When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room.
  • The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.
And, finally...
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, viruses, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a call center in Afghanistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck
 

Goldhedge

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Goldhedge

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the_shootist

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I gottta tell ya while I can...I love you guys! I hope we get through all this crap. A special thanks to GH for sticking with me
 

Uglytruth

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Not the place for it but i don't see how we get out of this without a civil war. Lots need eliminated in a non breathing kinda way. The constant turmoil is wearing on everyone.
 

Goldhedge

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Now we have to buy bananas?

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